Satire: Innovative water service upgrade for Mumbai Metro

mumbai metro rainLife in Mumbai was getting really frustrating. A few glimpses of tiny showers excited the people before it disappeared and didn’t come back. Scorching heat is never a problem in Mumbai, the humidity is. Even worse is the traffic that jams the city veins in all sectors. Those eager eyes that snatched the newspaper before anyone else could, just to read that the metro had finally opened, batted in disappointment. June was full of clouds but, no rains. The roads had Metro construction going on, but no glimpse of easy traffic. The only things found in abundance were the rivers of sweat and immobile traffic.

The government had to compensate for too many things. But, nobody expected that. How can anyone expect a bonus from a company that hasn’t paid regular remuneration to its most loyal employees? It was promised that December 2012 would be the date when the revolutionary metro would be open to all and the traffic that jammed Central, Harbour and western lines would diminish. The deadline wasn’t met. June 2013 was another promised date. The deadline was laughed off. December 2013 showed some glimpses of promises but then, it collapsed. Finally, on June 7th 2014, Mumbai Metro was open to commuters!

The people of Mumbai were very happy. Though the humidity hadn’t cheered them up, they seemed pretty OK with it. Traffic woes had decreased! People were travelling with ease! Everybody was in awe of the government for a change but then, the remarkable happened. The government decided to make up for its missed deadlines by introducing revolutionary methods in its metro rails. Come July 1st, it poured. Much to the utter joy and relief of the people, it poured immensely. That’s when Reliance’s surprise to Mumbai commuters was revealed. Special showers in the Metro compartment itself!

Early morning, when the rain commenced, all the compartments had gallons of water leaking down their roofs and the people loved it. Why wouldn’t they? After all, the government was so considerate about them. A few office suits though were drenched, the air conditioning stopped working and probably whole compartments were evacuated as there was no place where the water wouldn’t seep in. That’s all fine. All this is a pessimist’s viewing and there are a lot of positives to take away.

The government wanted the people to be fresh as blossoms when they go for work. Good. So many people who sweat it out while travelling need extra showers, hence the innovative service. Better. Kids who are en route to schools and colleges would feel as if they are on one of Water Kingdom’s massive roller coaster rides. Best. On top of everything, the government is compensating for the monsoon season itself by providing a rainy ambience inside the metro. What’s the use of rains if you don’t get drenched?
It also seems like an encouragement tactic on the part of the government. Evidently, they want the people of Mumbai to forget the 30 day delay in rains by getting out and being doused. So, they introduced this service where the commuters will definitely get a splash. The administration has done its research well; they know that at other spots it’s easy to hide or use waterproofing solutions. In a metro, you are helpless and apparently clueless. This old tactic is a part of Mumbai’s actual lifeline- the local train service- but, such innovation in a newly introduced service that the people were desperately waiting for is commendable. Stories of appreciation are all over Twitter and obviously, the government is overwhelmed.

But now, seemingly, they are planning to scrap off this remarkable service. The government probably believes that it must not provide so much joy to the people, if they do- the people’s expectation go too high and disappointments become imminent. Metro rails are now under process of removal of the shower service and soon, Mumbaikar’s will be deprived of this joyous innovation that brought tears of joy to their eyes.

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